Macmillan Holdings, LLC Being a "Go-Giver" can lead to success and happiness. Piaras MacDonnell Productivity Great podcast Stever, The previous comment makes a good point about "nice guys" but the root of the resentment is the "keeping score". Ferrazzi in his book "Never Eat Alone" addressed this issue in the modern context. A brief look at any of the modern religious text will allude to the ultimate rewards of giving without expectation of return. As a Relationship/Account manager I have found in the real world it's a balancing act between commercial realities and simply doing the right thing. My conclusion, don't bother keeping score, if the person valued your contribution they'll remember for you. http://getitdone.quickanddirtytips.com/give-to-build-success.aspx?commentid=12945#Comments http://getitdone.quickanddirtytips.com/give-to-build-success.aspx?commentid=12945#Comments Sun, 15 Jun 2008 13:41:33 GMT Anonymous Productivity I am a big fan of most of the Quick and Dirty Tips, but I had an issue with this one for those that are "nice guys," which is a form of codependence. I use to give and give and give, was caring, and good, thinking I would happy, loved and fufilled. Instead though, I was frustrated, resentful, and felt used. Relationships were especially terrible. Then I found No More Mr. Nice Guy by Dr. Robert Glover (www.nomoremrniceguy.com). I learned that nice guys give to get, holding secret resentment when they don't get what they want, they fix and caretake when they don't need to, they are scared of risk, and their often have intimacy dysfunctions. I learned how to stop seeking approval, be assertive (thanks to When I Say No, I Feel Guilty by Manuel J. Smith), and take care of my own needs. This book changed my life, and one of the keys was I had to stop giving (to get). I stopped giving, and fixed my own life. Now, I'm at a point where I take responsibility for my own needs, allowing me to give freely and happily to others, without resentment, allowing me to have more fulfilling friendships and relationships. So I caution folks, giving is important, but make sure it's not as a way to control others or avoid your own issues (ie codependence). There are too many people in the world that do that. http://getitdone.quickanddirtytips.com/give-to-build-success.aspx?commentid=12937#Comments http://getitdone.quickanddirtytips.com/give-to-build-success.aspx?commentid=12937#Comments Fri, 13 Jun 2008 01:02:27 GMT Sun, 15 Jun 2008 13:41:33 GMT http://getitdone.quickanddirtytips.com/give-to-build-success.aspx feedback@quickanddirtytips.com (Managing Editor) feedback@quickanddirtytips.com (Webmaster) en-us